In Which John Scalzi Makes a Great Point About Literature Snobbery

•May 14, 2013 • 7 Comments

 Being cranky about a Dan Brown book not being high literature is like yelling at a cupcake for not being a salad; it’s really missing the point. You don’t want the cupcake? Don’t eat the cupcake. Apparently lots of people like cupcakes. They don’t care that you want them to eat salad. You eat salad, if it’s so important to you.

John Scalzi, via this post on Whatever

Really it is just an all around great metaphor and works well to make its point (and, in my opinion, serves as a highlight of what is great about Mr. Scalzi’s blog).

So here’s the truth (and I’m a bit ashamed to admit it now): I used to be all sorts of snobby about Dan Brown books.  The Da Vinci Code came out to much acclaim and fanfare when I was a sophomore in college.  Because so many people were hooting and hollering about how amazing and fascinating and great it was, I decided to give it a go.  Perhaps needless to say at this point, I was not amused.  In fact, I pretty much hated it.  I thought that it was absurd, poorly written, and all around undeserving of any of the praise it was receiving.  Essentially, in my eyes, it was garbage.  And of course, I should know, because I was an English Major full of the know about what was “Great” literature and what was god awful shit.

Except I was wrong. And I am here now admitting it.

I probably will never love Dan Brown or his writing, it really just does not appeal to me.  With that said I will also probably never read another Dan Brown book.  I may, personally, wish that people would consider trying some other material besides Mr. Brown’s, but, ultimately, if The Da Vinci Code and other novels that Dan Brown wrote are your thing, if they’re your “cupcake,” then I must honestly and sincerely say “I hope you enjoy them.”

Just like with wine, ultimately the enjoyment of a book, comes down to a subjective opinion.  Sure there are things that seem to be more universally effective of accepted as “good,” but ultimately if you enjoy those Harlequin novels and think that Nabokov is crap, that is your opinion to keep.

And for what it is worth, I love a lot of books that wouldn’t meet a lot of the standards of “literature.”  Stephen King is arguably my all-time favorite author, and he’s had many slings and arrows thrown at him regarding the quality of his writing.  I also love the likes of Mr. Scalzi’s works, and while I think they are great and enjoyable, I am sure some literary scholars could happily and easily tear apart their “quality.”

Really, honestly, when we get down to it, we should just be happy that people are reading at all.  Sure, encourage people to try something new.  Recommend something challenging that’ll make them think about some different things.  But at the end of the day, let’s just let people eat whatever cupcakes the want.  We’d all be a lot happier this way.

Posted in General Destruction, Literature
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A Collection of Exhibits Demonstrating Why Wine Tastings/Review are Bullshit

•May 10, 2013 • Leave a Comment

iO9′s Robert Gonzalez provides us a number of studies and examples the demonstrate why wine tastings and reviews are really full of it.  Honestly none of these really surprise me.  Here’s why.  When it comes to taste preferences, even the most trained tongues among us, are still relying on our own unreliable subjective opinions and preferences.  We all have bias.  We all have things that we prefer one way or another.  And regardless of how rigorously we may try to hone our skill and suppress our personal preferences or bias so as to be “objective” in a matter, things like taste still rely, ultimately, on subjective appraisal.

Yes, it is true, that certain chemicals do create certain flavors or fragrances, however, that is the end of the objectivity matter.  Whether the presence of those flavors or fragrances are deemed good or bad will ultimately come down to that subjective appraisal.  Furthermore, as a couple of the examples in the article point out, even our subjective analysis and review is often lacking in a lot of consistency, so much so that we might respond differently to the exact same thing only moments apart.

This isn’t to say that there are not any wines that, as a whole, enjoy broad praise for quality.  Certainly there are plenty.  What it does say however, is that our insistent reliance on “experts” when it comes to things like wine (or whatever else really) is, at best, unnecessary, and in the extreme, really just kind of absurd.  If you like a bottle of five-buck-chuck, even though it is universally reviled by the elite of wine world, guess what?  Good for you, you have a wine that you enjoy and there is nothing wrong with that.

All too often, with some many things in life, we undermine our own pleasure and enjoyment, with the intent to try to confirm and adhere to some sense of conformity with an authority that deems what is good or not.  But when we see, that those authorities are not really nearly as reliable as they may claim, then we’re given a good opportunity to reevaluate and say, “hey, doesn’t it just make more sense to enjoy what we do enjoy, and not give a flying fuck if some critic or review says we should or shouldn’t?”  The answer is “yes, we should just enjoy whatever we happen to.”  Life is a lot better that way.

Posted in food, General Destruction
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Book Pairing

•May 8, 2013 • Leave a Comment

Here is an idea that just popped into my head.  It goes something like this: Just as you might pair a wine with certain types of foods, could you also, actively and consciously, choose to pair books, such that you are reading two (or more) books at the same relative time (not, like, with one in each hand, but more reading a bit of both daily or so), so as to create a general sense of pairing, so that the themes and subjects of one match-up and accentuate the themes and subjects of the other(s)?  I say you can!

When I read I find myself thinking a lot about the things going on in the book (and I am going to assume this is the case for most people, because if not, well I don’t really know, hope you’re having fun I guess). I believe I do this equally between fiction and non-fiction.  Additional, I often am reading more than one book at once.    I’ll often have a book that I leave at work to read during lunch and another at home to read at night or during other free time (sometimes I’ll also have a third, like right now where I have two at work; one for while I am eating lunch, one after I am done eating lunch but still on lunch break). When I am reading multiple books I often find how the ideas in one enhance or contrast the ideas in other in fascinating and exciting ways.  This is the essence I think of what “Book Pairing” would be.

The challenge then, would be to propose good book pairings.  I feel that, as a rule, the books cannot be about the same thing (like say, two Jane Austen novels, or two books about the history of Mexico) because essentially that is like trying to pair baked potatoes with mashed potatoes, regardless of how good the potatoes are in both cases, they’re still both potatoes.  No, they have to, at least at face value, be about different things.  Even better, would be if one were fiction and the other a non-fiction.  I am going to work on some proposals of pairings and maybe I’ll come back and post some in the future.  In the meantime, I’d love to hear some other folks proposals for good book pairings.

Enjoy!

Posted in General Destruction, Literature
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What Is the Worst Kind of Rotting Smell?

•May 8, 2013 • 1 Comment

Warning (if the title didn’t do so for you), I’m talking about gross stuff in this post.  If you don’t like gross stuff don’t read this post . . . which is about gross stuff.  There, you’re aptly warned. Gross stuff below!

Okay, so a disgusting question, yes, but one that I got to thinking about the other day.  I have encountered a wide range of rotting smells over the years, primarily due to keeping compost (it becomes kind of inevitable with that), but also, on occasion  for leaving something in the fridge past its prime (or worse yet, forgetting to put something in the fridge in the first place), or running into something dead out in the world.  All around, the smell of rot tends to be unpleasant, to say the least, if not outright sickening.  But what rotting thing smells the worst?

I do not know if there is some kind of official measurement of smell or the horribleness of rot-stench so I am just going go out on a limb and say that the worst  kind of rotting smell is “flesh.” Whether it be meat or a dead animal; that is the truly worst of the worst when it comes to disgusting.  Honestly, I am pretty tolerant of strong smells most of the time, and really, as best as I can recall, the only time I’ve honestly ever wretched at a smell was when, working at a plant nursery a few years back, I came upon a wonderfully decaying dead rat.  It was rough.  I don’t know what it is about rotting animal matter, but it has a tendency to be real bad.

Okay, so what about non-animal things?  While none of it smells great I tend to think that there are three things in particular that are real bad compared to all others.  Onions, potatoes, and peppers.  I don’t really know what it is about these three veggies (fruit, if you want to be all technical in the case of the peppers), but when they go bad, they go real bad. They also seem to have the tendency to go bad real fast and suddenly.  Like, they are fine and good one day, and then the next they are just a pile of rank death and disgust.  Furthermore, at least in the case of potatoes and onions, these are food things I often have in high abundance, raising the risk of them suddenly turning on me (also increasing their quantity in the compost). What interests me about them however, is that each one has a unique and different rotting smell.  Onions still smell, essentially, like onions, just stronger and worse and evil.  Potatoes get this slick sewage rot smell to them.  Almost oily.  And peppers, they just have this cloying and clinging sickly sweet rot, that permeates through everything.  Other veggies and fruits are not great, but a carrot or a lemon never seem to be quite as foul as an onion or pepper past its prime.

While we’re on the subject, perhaps it is worth considering the “why” of rotting things smelling so bad. I suspect (though don’t have the direct evidence to back this up) that the primary reason things smell so bad to us when they rot is as a biological defense mechanism to prevent us from eating said rotting things.  The process of decomposition involves an astounding amount of microorganism and while many are likely harmless to us, some are apt to have a potential to cause us to get quite sick (if not kill us, and making us into rotting things. Just sayin’).  Thus it is, from a survival standpoint, pertinent to be made to want to avoid rotting things. Additionally, as a last line of defense, rotting things taste disgusting (though this is actually partially due to smell too, as fragrance plays a huge role in how we interpret tastes).   So, when you gag at some disgusting rot smell you can (after you are done gagging and dry heaving) thank evolution from keeping you from wanting to put that dead possum in your mouth (enjoy putting all the not-dead possums in your mouth that you want to.  I’m sure said possums will be really cooperative with you about it).

I feel like it is worth noting that dogs, universally, seem to have lost this revulsion to rotting things.  Instead, somewhere along the way, their minds got rewired to interpret rottingness as the greatest most fascinating and alluring smells ever encountered.  So great are they that the dogs will happily roll in said rotting stuff, eat it, and also offer it as gifts of absolute love to their friend-beasts (aka you and me).  Hey dogs, evolution pulled a fast one on you, that rotting skunk is not amazing, it is real real gross, leave it alone.

Oh, if you are like me, and don’t get particularly easily grossed out at things (besides dead rats, crawling with maggots, and smelling of death in the worst imaginable way possible), you might want to watch “After Life: The Science of Decay.”  It is a truly fascinating look at the whole process of rotting and decay that will eventual reduce all of us to nothing but our most base elements (Hooray!)

That is all.  Oh! And just in time for lunch. MMM-MM!

Posted in food, Gardening, General Destruction, mushrooms
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In Which Shelob Emerges

•May 7, 2013 • Leave a Comment

Last night, I was laying in bed, quietly engaged in reading Amy Stewart’s wonderful (if not a bit disturbing) “Wicked Bugs.”  Ceres, was curled up in the floor doing the normal dog sleeping thing. Suddenly a large moth started flappin’ about the room.  I didn’t know where it came from, and at the time didn’t really care, I just didn’t want it in the bedroom.  So I got up and attempted to swat the moth down.  My movement alerted Ceres, who quickly awoke, and soon was engaged in active moth watching with a look of fascination and hunger (fact: Ceres is not discrete when it comes to her enjoyment of eating bugs).

As I attempted to catch the moth the fluttering insect suddenly found itself caught in a messy spindly cobweb up high on one of our bookcases.  I counted this as a blessing, because now the moth was relatively immobilized and would be easier to remove.  I was just about to reach up and capture it, when I was beat to the act by the single largest spider I have ever seen in my house. I want to insist that this is saying something.  Besides the occasional black widow I am quite opposed to killing spiders in the house because they are beneficial predators who contribute to keeping other pest bugs away.  I have grown accustomed to seeing large male Southern House Spiders slowly lurking about, but this one made even them look minute.  This large, smooth, and black-brown spider scuttled out, grabbed the moth (quite large itself) and quickly went to work encasing it webbing.  Then, with the job done, it took its meal, and disappeared back behind the books from which it had emerged. I looked at the titles, trying to determine if they were anything that I might want to read soon.  They were not, so I decided to let the thing say where it was.  I did decide that it deserved the name “Shelob” however, being large enough to make an audible noise while it moved (at best guess, including its legs, I’d put this at about three inches long).

With a bit of research I’ve come to the conclusion that this is the female version of those Southern House Spiders (aka Crevice Weaver Spider) I’ve seen; a member of the species Kukulcania hibernalis.  These spiders exhibit very extreme sexual dimorphism, so much such that the males and females are often mistaken for two separate species. The males are often mistaken as Brown Recluse spiders, whereas the females have a look similar to that of a tunnelweb spider or a small smooth tarantula. While large and kind of disturbing looking Southern House Spiders are harmless to humans, and, in fact, serve as very effective pest controls.  If you don’t like these in your house, but, like me, are opposed to killing them, it is best not to just put them directly outdoors, as they are not accustomed to the colder weather.  Instead I recommend dropping them down some duct working, or putting them in the crawls space or a shed, where they can continue to serve as predators of more annoying bugs.

I wish I could have gotten a good picture of her, but ol’ Shelob liked her privacy and disappeared before I had a chance to snap a shot.  There are some good photos of them on What’s that Bug however.  Here is a photograph I’ve managed to snap of a big male one (possible Shelobs husband?) a while back:

They might look creepy slowly lurking about the house, however, the male Southern House Spider (Kukulcania hibernalis) is harmless, mostly blind, in with jaws too tiny to even bite a human. They look quite different from their female counterparts due to extreme sexual dimorphism.

They might look creepy slowly lurking about the house, however, the male Southern House Spider (Kukulcania hibernalis) is harmless, mostly blind, in with jaws too tiny to even bite a human. They look quite different from their female counterparts due to extreme sexual dimorphism.

FYI, the irony of my reading “Wicked Bugs” when Shelob emerged has not be lost on me.

 

 

Posted in General Destruction
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Scentless Roses are Silly

•May 3, 2013 • Leave a Comment

I wanted to say “stupid” in the title, but I decided to lighten the tone a little, just because, somebody, somewhere, would probably take offense at me calling their boring non-fragrant roses “stupid.”  Oh!  They can read this too?  Well shit, cats out of the bag folks.  I think scentless roses are stupid!

Generally speaking I don’t care for the fragrance of a lot of flowers (especially paper-whites, those things make me nauseous).  I find a lot of them simply too fragrant and kind of cloying.  However, I have long had a fondness for the smell of roses.  In fact, I might be so bold to say that I think the scent of roses is about one of the most appealing smells that can be encountered.

So imagine my dismay when, not too long ago, I was informed that some are scentless.  I was even further shocked to learn that this is not a flaw in design, but in fact a product of intention.  I literally and verbally said “What the fuck?”

Sure, roses can offer more than just their delightful smell.  They can be really beautiful plants and add a lot to landscaping.  And probably there are some folks who don’t like the smell of roses (fyi, they’re wrong, roses smell great, because . . .  science or something).  But, it just seems weird to me to breed varieties that don’t have even some slight degree of a scent.

For our part Eliza and I actively choose to only grow scented roses.  Eliza has grown a lot and a wide variety of roses over they years, and they represent one of the few ornamental species we’re actively incorporating into our yard.  Why, well a big part of it is because we both want to enjoy their wonderful fragrances.

I’m gonna say it again, scentless roses are stupid.

Posted in Gardening, General Destruction
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I Want a Seed Library

•April 30, 2013 • Leave a Comment

I work at a library and I garden regularly. In many cases these two things may seem mutually exclusive, however, there is a growing trend of public libraries throughout the country establishing “seed libraries.”

The concept is pretty straight forward and simple.  Patrons to the libraries can “check-out” seeds.  Of course, as the purpose of seeds is to plant them, the patron is not directly returning those specific seeds, but some models encourage the patrons who use the system to in tern save their own seeds and donate them for future loaning.

I think there is a lot to be said about this.  Plants, in general produce a lot of seeds per an individual of a species.  With proper care in regards to pollination, making sure not to collect from hybrids, and correct seed processing, a single plant can provide plenty of seeds for a large number of other people to plant in turn. If more people plant the seeds, and then in turn practice seed saving themselves, the quantity of viable seeds increases significantly.  Seeds are often not cheap, and providing free access to a variety of plant seeds thus can encourage more people to start growing things.  Additionally, I suspect that seed libraries could have a long term net benefit to preserving more heirloom varieties of plants, and possibly encouraging the development of new heirloom varieties.

This is something that I would love to see eventually at my library.  I have talked to some people with similar interest and hope that maybe in a few years this might be something we can try out.  There is a lot of rural farmland throughout Greenville county which could foster an interest.  Also, there is a definite growing movement of urban gardening and community gardens in the more developed areas of the county.  I think, that with the right approach, something like a seed library could do really well here.

So, we’ll see.  In the meantime, I need to work more on saving seeds well.

Some links:

http://www.seedlibrary.org/

http://newdream.s3.amazonaws.com/19/20/3/3063/webinar_slides_seed_library.pdf

Posted in Gardening, General Destruction
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