Orange Yetis: A contemplation
Question: (specifically for the guys over at OrangeCoat but others might be interested too). As an animal would an Orange Yeti be all that effective in the mountainous tundra environment that Yetis, as a whole, generally inhabit? I mean big, furry, and bright orange isn’t exactly subtle with a background of snow, ice, and rocks. I like to speculate that an Orange Yetis likely evolved (or were bestowed by God) their bright orange coats (no reference really intended) to mimic the orange clothing that hunters wear in the woods. You see I think that Orange Yetis are likely more forest inhabitants than mountain beasts mostly because that orange coloring would just be troublesome while trying to hunt or hide in the snow. But in the forests it may be very effective at preventing such Yetis from getting shot by the casual deer hunter. The hunter would be all like “Don’t worry buddy, I see ya, not gonna shoot over that away, smart fellow wearing that orange coat.” In response the Yeti would likely growl and gurgle something inarticulately, which in turn would be interpreted as a day of bad luck by the other hunter. There could be Orange Yetis in the woods all around us whom we have just continually mistaken as large drunken hunters. Quick call some zoologists or at least some crypto-zoologists (who may be easier to convince) and lets head to the woods. We are going to catch us a Yeti!
Yetis are color blind. They are herbivorous ruminants that forage for tubers, legumes, and multiple varieties of lichen during the summer months. They hibernate during the winter in cozy underground dens insulated by many generations of mossy padding. Orange yetis are crepuscular mammals indigenous to the far north. At those latitudes, the waning sunlight casts an orangey glow on the landscape. It’s the reflection of that crisp northern sunlight that gives them their name. It also helps that their diet is very high in beta carotene.
indeed . . . everybody knows tundra carrots are full o’ beta carotene! mmm mmm tubers!